A Story about Hopeless (guy) 'n' Romantic (girl) ...

She: Do I look fat?

He: Well, it depends ...

She: On ?

He: On what you eaten?

She: How is that related?

He: Because its relative. Now considering that you had eaten something yesterday you must have taken something today as well. Now let us assume that with whatever you had taken yesterday some of it has gone to take care of your daily calorie requirement and some part of it has been excreted. If there were regular motions than the amount excreted would have been more or less same, but if there are irregular motions than the question is whether the amount excreted was less than or more than regular. So logically in one case you would be lighter than what you had been yesterday and on the other hand you would have been heavier. But again, it is important to understand whether you had weighed yourself yesterday and today. If you did not weigh yourself yesterday, you would never know in relative terms the increase in the weight. So it would not be possible to determine whether you are fat or not. Another important aspect to be take in consideration is whether the weighing machine was calibrated or not. See, it is necessary to note that there are measuring errors as well. Also, the manufacturers also give the tolerances i.e., the degree to which the errors can occur. Say the weighing machine shows 60 kgs and the measuring error is say +/- 1% so it means that your weight can vary by 0.6 kgs or 600 gms. So, if the weighing machine has a error of +1% you may conclude that you have grown fatter than yesterday ...

She: Ok, ok I got it !! Can we change the topic ? I see you have gone for a hair cut. Its looking nice. Btw, have you noticed, you losing a lot of hair... why don't you do something for it?

He: Tell me something, How much Hair does a Man Need ?

She: Sufficient to cover his head ...

He: Well, going a bit off topic over here, I would like to quote Leo Tolstoy from his famous story "How much Land does a Man Need", in this great story, Leo Tolstoy had told regarding the greeds of needing more and more land and finally the man was buried in a 7 ft (length) x 4 ft (breadth) x 4 ft (depth) pit. So inspite of getting so much land finally his land requirements was as mentioned earlier. Now coming back to the topic of discussion, I would like to admit that this thought did cross my mind when I was there back at the hair cutting saloon and I have managed to get a answer as well.

She: Oh really ?? And that is ?

He: Well its, 52,47,834.

She: Thats the amount of hair required? Amazing !! How did you do it?

He: Well, its not that difficult. Now if you look at my head, you would see that it is difficult to determine the exact shape. I mean you cannot call it a square or a circle or a rectangle or a octagon or any of the conventional geometric shapes. And in order to calculate the no. of hair required on the head, you would first require the area of the head cover. Then you need the density of the hair? So whether the hair follicles are thin in density or thick? If the hair follicles are thin, you would be requiring more number of hair to cover the same area and vice versa. So our first concern would be to calculate the area of the head, only than can we assume the thickness of the hair follicles and subsequently calculate the number of hair required to cover the head. Now if we were to draw a borderline on the sidelines of the head and take that basic shape we would not get a perfect (as we know it) geometric shape. In order to find the area, we would apply finite integration for the same. Now, the question of the limits to be considered has to be assumed to a certain extent and the calculation errors can be approximated to +/- 5%. According to my calculations the area is approximated to about 126 sq. cm. One element which I have not considered in the calculations though is the length of the hair. So, if we were to take that into consideration, the head cover would sufficient to get covered even with less number of hair. But than it is more about illusion than actually head cover, because if I don't comb my hair and the long hair fall across the head, it may seem that I have a lot of hair, which may not necessarily be the case and if i pull my hair backwards, it may seem that I have lost a lot of hair, which again should not be the case. So, practically there are many factors that may suggest that I have lost a lot of hair but it may not be ...

She: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

3rd Person: Sheeeesh .... n they say women speak more than men !!